An urgent message

Hey, do you want some middle-aged creep who looks like a sinister turtle to install listening devices throughout all our houses? Do you want him to record all your conversations and monitor your spending habits? Do you want him to get so rich that he can build himself a personal colony in space so he can live on as the world below burns (look up Blue Origin)? Well, I don’t know about you, but this sounds a bit too dystopian to me. And by a bit, it mean horrifyingly too much. So therefore, let me suggest a new holiday for us hobo-folk and supporters to stick it to oligarchs like Bezos. Prime Time to Boycott Amazon Day!

Naturally, I chose this to correspond to Amazon’s prime day. Now I know, it may seem tempting to get a discount on pointless tacky good that will give us a brief rush and a following feeling of emptiness, but I ask you, my friends, to resist. Think about it this way: Bezos isn’t doing this to be nice to the consumer. Nor is he going to take a hit from the free, fast shipping. What happens instead is that the workers and shippers and gonna be put on overdrive for a weekend of hell. And if you think like I do, it doesn’t feel good to be a part of that.

So, therefore, let me suggest something different. Let’s not buy anything from this tyrannical giant that’s in the process of consuming the entire globe. I know it’s hard to avoid since they’ve practically cornered the market, and other giants like Walmart are also terrible. However, we can go a whole weekend without consuming. We could free up time and do stuff more fun, like hiking, or playing with dogs, or writing posts and making cartoons for a travel blog. These are just my suggestions (because they are quite awesome), but feel free to get creative and think of something on your own if you’d like.

Also, for bonus points, feel free to add insult to injury. Maybe you’re sick and tired of Alexa? You could set it on fire and throw it out a window. Maybe you think healthy food shouldn’t cost so much money or be so pretentious. You could grow your own garden and then throw the rotten tomatoes at Whole Foods. Or maybe you can just make an effigy of Bezos and burn it in effigy. The options are endless, but please, don’t comply to what he wants. That’s all I ask.